Left Doti today and I can’t say I’m not happy but it was definitely bittersweet. I love, love, loved the children but I couldn’t deal with the spiders and cold water anymore. And as I say this I feel myself cringing at how selfish and spoilt I sound. We drove to Dhanghadhi yesterday and stayed the night at hotel Devotee to catch the Kathmandu flight today. After being in Doti for the past week, the hotel was like a palace. We had AC, hot water and even though the power went out, there was a generator. But there was no Aysha and no Mina. I didn’t even get to spend a last day with Mina. She didn’t come to school on Monday and I was so heartbroken because I really wanted to be able to say good bye to her. Mina is the the little girl I blogged about a few days ago that I had bonded with. I spent the whole day looking out for her, hoping she was going to come, but she never did, and I couldn’t remember what her sister looked like so I wasn’t able to ask her what happened to Mina. I hope she’s okay.
Doti was an amazing experience. It was more moving and life changing than I ever thought it would be. People that had been here the first time kept telling me it would be a life changing experience/change me and I don’t think I believed them completely or grasped the gravity of what they were trying to tell me.
I’ve discovered a burning desire to make changes and impact the lives of those in need, regardless of how small. I now want to go home and help my people. I’ve always said I wouldn’t go home after college, but that may not be true anymore.
This morning I also realized how irritated I am by those who have the means and ability to help those in need but have no desire to do so and don’t even care. I want to help people without anything. I want to fix the world. I don’t understand how others couldn’t feel the same way. It’s such a pity that there are so many out there with more than enough funds to probably rebuild the whole of Doti, and they truly don’t want to help.
All I know is, I’m changed, as cliche as it sounds. But it’s true. Doti changed my life and how I think and I have new desires in life. I just hope that when I get back to school, I don’t get so caught up in life that I don’t continue on this path. I’m going to join Habitat for Humanity and get way more involved in service work. And get more involved in MLB. I can thank Doti, MLB and, most of all, Aysha and Mina for that.